My Girlfriend Is a Fan of Me

Chapter 4

I still remember it.

I remember the words he said to me when I came to him unexpectedly and asked for a consultation like a Zen koan.

In retrospect, they weren't difficult words. No, they were words that anyone could have said.

I mean, he's not a therapist or anything, and he's not somebody who's so amazing that he's going to come up with some kind of primal solution, if you'll pardon the pun.

But I think the reason why his words resonated with me so much was because they were so simple.

Something that no one else could have said to me. Not my parents, not my brother, not even my closest confidant, Secretary Kim.

What it boiled down to was that I was okay.

I'm not an empty person, I just compare myself to others and fool myself into thinking I am. Everything I've accomplished so far proves that.

So I should continue to live my life doing the things I find enjoyable and the things I want to do.

It wasn't until then that I realized.

I realized that no one had ever said to me, “It's okay.

In that sense, he was an interesting person.

He didn't just throw out clichés irresponsibly, but he genuinely empathized with me and understood my feelings, and he said something that I might have been waiting for in my subconscious mind.

[LSH0306] - Koha!

- I see you're here again today, thank you.

From that day on, I found myself tuning in to his broadcast every night.

I didn't have to be Ryu Seoha in front of him.

.

.

. . .

.

Wearing a name tag that said “STAFF” on my chest, I entered the party with trepidation.

I'll have to give secretary Kim a bonus later for honoring my request for a seat where my identity wouldn't be revealed. She's definitely on top of things.

Thrilled. Thrilled.

It's amazing, by the way. I can't believe that I can be so excited just to meet someone, even in front of so many employees.

As I listened to the quiet thumping of my heart in my chest, a woman approached me with quite a bit of urgency.

“You must be the staff member from Party Emergency Help today, please come over here!”

“Yes.”@@@@

And so I go to meet you.

To let you know how much I appreciate you.

***.

December 24th.

“I see you're all playing rabang....”

As I looked around for a while, I couldn't help but say to myself.

As it was an invitation-only party for streamers, most of them were taking pictures of themselves with their phones or selfie sticks.

Some of them were busy grabbing streamers as they walked by, capturing them in their screens and greeting them, and at times, I was glad I didn't know them.

I was like, “Oh, that's what insiders do.

“Hey, who's that guy, he looks pretty good.”

“Where?”

“That guy over there, I've never seen him before.... Is he a no-cam broadcaster?”

As I walked by the table, I heard two women chatting, so I looked around to see if I could catch a glimpse of the handsome face, but I didn't see anyone in particular.

“Hey, I see him. Get down, get down.”

“......?”

I made eye contact with both of them, but they simultaneously averted their gazes as if they'd made a promise and went back to eating.

You can't be talking to me, I thought, unless there's something seriously wrong with your aesthetics.

“He's pretty innocent-looking, isn't he?”

“Yeah, kind of nerdy?”

The women's comments continued until the moment I left the area.

I don't know who, but I'm jealous.

Come on, let's eat.

“Oh....”

Holding on to my stomach, I headed to the buffet-style display next to the terrace, where the food looked pretty good for a year-end party.

Wow, the quality is definitely good. If I leave here full, I'll have enough to pay for a cab home.

I've got one more slice to unpack for the viewers tomorrow, and that's a good thing.

“If you need any more wine or steak, just let me know and I'll bring it right over.”

“Okay, thank you.”

My mouth watered, I looked at the food, and a man with a “STAFF” nametag wandered by and said, “Steak and wine.

Steak and wine. Honestly, I don't know how to taste alcohol, so leaving aside the wine, I might be able to pull off the steak.

But if I eat it now, I won't know whether it goes through my nose or my mouth, so I'll have to wait until later. I can't get enough of the food on display here.

As I continued to browse with my eyes, I was about to pick up the first food I chose with my tongs and put it in a large bowl.

“Hey, hey, hey.... Cosmo?”

“...Yes?”

I turned my head reflexively at the sound of a woman's voice from out of nowhere.

There stood a beautiful woman I'd never seen before, wearing a 'STAFF' name tag just like the man I'd just seen, looking a little shy.

He stared at her, mesmerized by her good looks, until he was slapped in the face with a sudden realization.

How does this guy know I'm Cosmo, and I'm not even wearing a name tag?